Mar 03, 2018

The costumes for a rain dance can range anywhere from colorful beads, to outright fantastical headsets with great plumages erupting a couple feet into the sky. Tribesmen dancing to the regular beatings of drums, muttering their ancient tribal rain dance incantations; it's a sight to behold, particularly when it works, and the rain pours down as summoned.


How many times have you checked what your XRP holdings are worth today? Lots? We all do; it's natural. Obsessive tendencies are most exhibited when greed is involved. There's a darker side to obsessiveness though, the "need" for control.

Controlling yourself, is the utmost challenge when investing in crypto. It's difficult to hodl in the face of massive declines, or even stagnation over longs periods of time, but I think we all know that the second you sell everything is when the price decides to jump up 10%. It happens all the time, and not by accident neither. Whale bots are watching you, and if they see you panic, gulp!

So now you're a pro at self-control, you hodl through thick and thin, and endure the agony by watching it the entire time. Your time is spent compulsively reading about XRP. News article after news article, blog after blog, Twitter, Reddit, XRPChat, etc. Seems like there's an endless stream of optimism, pessimism, opinions, "facts", FUD, and FOMO.

And still you wait.

You read something on XRPChat that pisses you off. Some dinkus said something bad about XRP. You try to forget about it because they're just an idiot and obviously so. They don't have any influence on your beloved XRP.. or do they??

You watch the price of XRP slip a bit.. That..BASTARD!! Somewhere deep in your head, the lizard awakens, and it's pissed. From its primordial point of view, a scrumptious meal has literally been taken out of its mouth. You realize it's no longer sufficient to have mastered self-control; so too must others be "controlled", lest they ruin all that has been accomplished with XRP thus far.

So you join the forum, find the moron's post, and LAMBASTE their ignorance with a potent smarmy matter-of-fact counterargument, that is SURE to absolutely CRUSH them into begging for forgiveness, ha ha...

Their reply is nothing short of astonishing.. Not only do they callously reject your very sound logical argument, but they again reinstate theirs with an admittedly compelling barrage of counterpoints. You think to yourself, "well I never.. how dare this insipid disrespectful beast attempt to further disparage XRP!" Now you're committed, now you're facing the public, now you have to do your homework.

One by one you investigate the posits made by the "enemy". #1 refuted by 'this', #2 refuted by 'that', #3 well, I can't find anything to refute that, but it's just wrong, I know it is, #4 Everyone else says this is wrong so I'll just repeat that mantra, etc.

What started as an attempt to scientifically disprove someone's position, starts slipping into dogmatic regurgitation, hearsay, and...BLIND FAITH. Passion becomes the "new" validation for your position. Sure, there's tons of facts underlying it all, but you don't fully understand them, yet you console yourself that at least you're on the "right" side of not fully understanding them, unlike that dumb shmuck that obviously sits on the wrong side; and being in the "right" makes everything you say justifiable, even if you don't really know what you're saying.

The worst part of the "audacity" of the anti-XRP "trolls" is how belligerent and toxic they are to your good feeling about XRP. They are bringing you down, forcing you to consider the potential negatives, HARSHING YOUR HIGH! Goddammit, please just stop denigrating XRP you assholes! It's perfect, and all of you suck! Look at the damage you cause, the price is nowhere near where it should be! I...."DESERVE" have the price go to the MOON!!!

You're just one person though, you realize you need help in neutralizing the negative XRP rhetoric, so you enlist in other XRP groups, and together you literally assault heretics en masse. Driving their statements into obscurity; smashing their online reputations until they are robotically silenced! Another enemy is crushed; there will be no freedom of speech if it hurts my..."precious".

Foaming at the mouth, you continuously pore through forum after forum, seeking targets to highlight to your "army", and the battle rages. Sometimes the price of XRP moves a couple % up, and you celebrate! "It's working!! We're beating the savages back!" But sometimes the price of XRP moves down a bit. Oh the RAGE! The SEETHING RAGE!! I can sleep another day, but TODAY, my XRP needs to be SAVED!!

Several months later, you're infamous within your army, you've got thousands of followers on multiple forums, a blog, have spoken personally with Ripple staff, your username recognized everywhere. Yet still, the price stagnates, you have huge bags under your eyes; you're on the verge of a breakdown.

You're friends have given up on you, your back is starting to give out on you, and you can't believe how relentless the onslaught of XRP naysayers continues to be. After all this effort, despite all this "truth" education you've delivered, still, the ignorance perseveres like a mindless pestilence that can't be stopped, can't be reasoned with, and won't let your XRP moon. Fucking... bastards...

Then it happens..

Out of nowhere..

XRP moonshot.

10x OVERNIGHT!! Some large bank in Timbuk2 decided to go live with ODL!

one...fucking... bank...

Holy shit! Holy shit! Holy shit! You're not even making sense, just babbling like a junkie that took TWO needles. OMG OMG OMG. You can't even type, you're so twacked on ethereal juice, lol. Can life get any better than this??

You find that bank's Twitter account and send them a joyfilled message, "Welcome friends!! We are so glad to be joined with you on this glorious day!! Thank you thank you thank you for finally PROVING beyond a doubt that we were RIGHT this whole time! It's been a very long struggle, but we've worked hard to keep XRP alive for you as we patiently waited for you to be our SAVIOR! We thank you and we will continue to dedicate ourselves to making sure you are protected from the ANIMALS that fight the cause!"

A few days later, you finally get their much anticipated reply....

"uhhh...ok? Who are you exactly?"


Somewhere in Zimbabwe it rained today.. and the tribes rejoiced.

Comments welcome on Twitter

Previous Article

Next Article